Relationship counseling is for singles too!!
- Are you attracting Insignificant Others into your life?
- Are these potential partners unavailable in one form or another. Why is this? What is going on?
- Are you in the same relationship situation you’ve been in before and want out?
- Maybe you’re with a very similar person and it’s driving you crazy.
Patterns of Behaviour and Patterns of Relationships.
Relationship Counseling can help you highlight both previous Patterns of Behaviour and Patterns of Relationships.
It is only when we reflect on our other relationships – intimate and possibly non-intimate too- that we can begin to see the patterns of who we are and who we tend to become when we engage with others. We can gain insight if we purposely look at our behaviour – were we for instance jealous; generous; reliable; unreliable; dictatorial; a doormat. Have these behaviours worked for us in the past?
Similarly Relationship Counselling can help us reflect on our relationships and gain insight into the types of people we habitually get into relationships with. Have they tended to be with say intellectuals; addicts; commitophobes; committed to More Important Others (spouses, children, family, jealous cat) etc..
When you detect a pattern – or patterns and you realise that you’ve Done It To Yourself Again you may have an Aha moment all on your own and with a blinding flash of the bleeding obvious you see your ‘pattern’.
But most of us don’t. And our friends and loved ones either don’t see it – or don’t want to risk our wrath by pointing it out. This is where qualified relationship counseling gives insight and instruction.
If you are embarrassed at needing to ask a professional how to get more than a date, think of it like going to a chiropractor when your spine is misaligned. Sometimes we humans need help to get our inner selves straightened too.
A Relationship Counselor can point out your possible role of victim – a place of dis-empowerment where things happen to you – you are rootless, pushed about by the vagaries of the universe. In order to reclaim your power you need to work through the painful truth that you are giving out something which is attracting these categories of people into your life. If you give out different ‘vibes’ you attract a different potential Significant Other – the sort you really want to attract.
The Talmud states ‘We do not see the world as it is. We see the world as we are”
If you think of the mind as a projector, a video camera and our reality, our universe is the projection screen, then our history, our DNA is the film cam that records the experiences of life. We project all manner of things onto the projection screen – we project ourselves – particularly onto other people. When we discuss disparagingly another in Relationship Counselling we might be asked to consider what part of myself do I see in that individual? Painful – yes. Insightful – yes. You don’t do this work on your own!
Relationship Counseling encourages the reclaiming of projections and it starts to enable the reclaiming of power. If you able to reclaim your projection you can choose your projections and you can attract the people into your life that you desire, you have the power to change and create what you want.In Relationship Counseling with Singles, or those who are deciding to leave a relationship – or not- it is important to dive into questions like:
What part of you is not available for a relationship?
What part of you doesn’t want to commit?
When you dive into these questions with the aid of a professional Relationship Counselor you can address what parts of you unconsciously give off signals that indicate you are not available for love, and you can allow yourself to attract those who want to commit to open their hearts to you.
After working with Relationship Counseling you hopefully will have a much clearer idea of who you want to have in your life, what kind of relationship you want with those individuals and how to revel in them!!